Hop aboard the Love Bus!

Just Own Yourself ™

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

Ah, that age old question. 

When I was a little girl, I wanted to be a school bus driver.  Lol, makes me giggle just typing that.😊 While all the other kids wanted to be a doctor, a policeman, a fireman, a teacher...then…yep, there I was, that awkward little girl with bow legs and freckles, who wanted to be a school bus driver.  I was always way too self-conscious to admit something so embarrassing, so I never revealed my sweet lil' secret to anyone.  That is, until the real reason dawned on me, and I finally realized WHY I was so drawn to wanting to drive a school bus for a living.

When I was in first grade, I remember having the most kind and beautiful bus driver who would stop near the corner of Londonberry Lane to pick up the school crew every weekday morning.  She greeted everyone with such friendliness and warmth, that one couldn’t help but feel extra special in her presence.  She welcomed us onto the bus with a big bowl of hard candy (this was back in the '70s!) and was always so pleasant and sweet.  There was a permanently etched smile on her face, and a ‘sing-song’ melody to her voice.  What a wonderful way to start the day greeted by a woman spilling over with kindness!

Many-many years later it hit me, it's not WHAT she was doing, but WHO she was that led me to believe I wanted to be a school bus driver.  I wanted to be just like her because of how special and valued she made me feel; because of her cheery disposition and genuine smile; because of the uplifting impact she made on those around her; because of the way she brought joy to each and every child who boarded her inspiring bus filled with love and kindness.

Instead of being defined by something outside of ourselves, a “job” or a “position” we acquire, what if we were to grow up with people asking what qualities we admire in others, what things we enjoy doing, what makes us happy and brings our soul alive.  I think these are the real questions we need to ask.  It is these questions that will lead to a path of fulfillment, as it becomes a discovery of those natural gifts already within ourselves, our inherent passions and  talents; and when our work is based around that, it is then we will find happiness – when it is about WHO we are, not “what” we think we should be doing.

In other words, when how we earn a living matches our interests and passions, it stops feeling like work.  And even if that isn’t how we earn our living, as long as we’re doing something in our lives that enhances those traits, such as a hobby, sport, craft or volunteer work, we feel more alive and our lives flow so much smoother because we are living a more balanced life. 

Just like my unforgettable bus driver from long ago (who never worked a day in her life!), I love making a difference, spreading kindness, bringing joy and inspiration to others.  So I ask you to look for the qualities you admire in others, and then to explore your heart and soul and find those traits and other jewels in yourself.  Also ask your children and other people in your life what they’re passionate about and encourage their interests … and let’s all hop on the joy bus and enjoy and embrace a purposeful passion-filled life!

“To love what you do and feel it matters, how could anything be more fun?” ~Katherine Graham

"Choose a job you love, and you will never work a day in your life."~Confucius

Peace and blessings to all,

~Victoria.

The vibrant JOY design can be purchased on an assortment of products here: www.zazzle.com/owningjoy



Language of Love

Just Own Yourself ™

 

 

Many years ago when my boys were in grade school, we took a trip to visit grandma and grandpa.  And when I say trip, I guess I'm luckier than most people who don't live near their folks.  It was only a twenty-minute drive door to door.  Being a single mother and working in the corporate world at that time, visiting mom and dad's house was a welcoming time to kick back, unwind, eat mom's awesome pork chops, and take a breather while grandma and papa entertained the kids. 

One particular evening comes to mind during a routine Monday evening visit.  Simple as the night may have seemed to most, it made a significant impact upon me. 

I loved to sit in dad's favorite spot - an oversized, tan upholstered chair in the family room that faced the television.  I wasn't much for TV, but there was some sort of contentment I found sitting in that chair. I'd normally grab a magazine, kick up my feet on the large ottoman, and munch on popcorn sprinkled with parmesan cheese.  I'd hear my boys laughing as they played with my parents in the background, knowing that before too long, my dad was going to want to relax with a bowl of butter pecan ice-cream in 'his' chair.

Here comes my favorite part... 

He'd pace back and forth in the kitchen, several feet behind the chair, expecting me to move – to the couch, to another room in the house, essentially anywhere; it didn’t matter where, as long as he could reclaim ‘his’ chair.  Sometimes he'd clear his throat, make unusual noises, or even stand directly beside the chair – however, the whole while he shuffled to and fro or stood beside me, he never said a single word to me! 

It became a game of sorts.  I'd sit, he'd pace or stand next to me, no words were ever exchanged, but I always knew exactly what he wanted.  I always waited for him to ask me to move, but for some reason he just wouldn't ask.  So, eventually, my mom would finally end up asking me to move, speaking for him, telling me that my dad wanted to sit in his chair. 

I never really understood what our little game was all about, until one evening while in the midst of him pacing behind me, it hit me like one of those vivid light-bulb moments.  My dad was never really one for words or showing his emotions.  I'd always wished differently, always yearned for that perfect "Father Knows Best" father, until I started to read between the lines and accept my father for who he is and not what I wished for him to be.  That's when I figured out that by him not being able to ask me to move from his chair was his way of saying "I love you". 

No wonder that was my favorite place to sit, and why the game went on for so long. 

I came to understand that the language of love can be communicated in many different ways, and not to expect or anticipate receiving it in the way we might think is the “right” way.  Some people can easily verbalize their emotions.  Other people feel awkward showing emotion or articulating their feelings, so they express themselves in nonverbal ways, such as my father.  For others, even a slight touch on the arm or some small gesture of kindness is their way of letting you know you are loved and appreciated.  We have to open not only our ears, but also our eyes and hearts to interpret the many signs and symbols of love. 

My boys are now grown, my parents have since moved from that house, and I do miss our little game.  It was so sweet and simple, yet spoke volumes.  Today is my father's 69th birthday, which is probably why I find myself reflecting on this story and what he's taught me. 

Happy Birthday, dad ... I love you, too. 

Peace and blessings to all,

Victoria





Joy - a wonder working technique!

Just Own Yourself ™

 

"The greatest gift you can give yourself is joy, not only because of the feeling that goes with it at the moment, but because of the magnificent experience it will draw to you. It becomes your mark, your nature, your name. It is a wonder-working technique that will produce wonders in your life."
~Jack Boland